last of summer.
I apologize if it's been quite a long time since I updated. I guess I just really wanted to make my last summer post the day exactly before the start of classes. And today is THAT today. So there.
Pre-first day jitters. Haha. Well I guess this is pretty normal, but really I feel this uncertainty about some things. This year, I want to really do good, to turn out to be a better person but apparently that's easier said than done. For the past few years, I've had my comfort zones, things I know I can always fall back on when things go wrong, like this blog for example. And I have a lot of comfort zones, at least one for every bitter emotion I think I have. But what happens when you have to let go of one? Surely it wouldn't be an easy task especially if you've held on for dear life for this thing. And what really sucks is that you know you understand the reason why you have to do this. You know it's for the better, you know it's for something good. But no matter how many times you say to yourself that someday it'll all turn out to be okay, you can't bring yourself to give it up. You can't do it. And no matter how many times you force yourself to say, "I'm okay," you know you're not. You want to accept it because you understand, but somehow you can't. Because you know that that's not what you want. You want things to stay. But they can't. They won't. And it leaves you feeling vulnerable and afraid of what could happen. And as much as I want to believe that I can do this, somehow I don't think I can. But of course, I have to do it. I have no choice. And hopefully, one day soon, I'll be able to accept the fact that no, things won't go back to the way they were -- not anytime soon.
Don't worry though, I know I'm going to be okay. Not right away, but yeah, I think I can deal with it. And nooo, don't tell me that I don't understand because I perfectly do. The facts are just not sinking yet. But what the hell, I can do this. I'm Wonder Woman, right?
Pre-first day jitters. Haha. Well I guess this is pretty normal, but really I feel this uncertainty about some things. This year, I want to really do good, to turn out to be a better person but apparently that's easier said than done. For the past few years, I've had my comfort zones, things I know I can always fall back on when things go wrong, like this blog for example. And I have a lot of comfort zones, at least one for every bitter emotion I think I have. But what happens when you have to let go of one? Surely it wouldn't be an easy task especially if you've held on for dear life for this thing. And what really sucks is that you know you understand the reason why you have to do this. You know it's for the better, you know it's for something good. But no matter how many times you say to yourself that someday it'll all turn out to be okay, you can't bring yourself to give it up. You can't do it. And no matter how many times you force yourself to say, "I'm okay," you know you're not. You want to accept it because you understand, but somehow you can't. Because you know that that's not what you want. You want things to stay. But they can't. They won't. And it leaves you feeling vulnerable and afraid of what could happen. And as much as I want to believe that I can do this, somehow I don't think I can. But of course, I have to do it. I have no choice. And hopefully, one day soon, I'll be able to accept the fact that no, things won't go back to the way they were -- not anytime soon.
Don't worry though, I know I'm going to be okay. Not right away, but yeah, I think I can deal with it. And nooo, don't tell me that I don't understand because I perfectly do. The facts are just not sinking yet. But what the hell, I can do this. I'm Wonder Woman, right?
Yesterday, my dad and I watched X-men 3. And it was great actually. It was the best X-men movie for me, though the story was really different from the original cartoon series. While watching the movie, I can't help but smirk at Beast because I swear, everytime I hear him talk I hear Frasier!! Haha. I can't concentrate because Frasier na Frasier yung voice. =) But all in all it was great. Too bad though that Cyclops had to die so soon. James Marsden (the actor who played Cyclops) was I think one of my first celebrity crush way back in his Ally McBeal days. Haha. And yes, too bad for him because Wolverine got to make out with Jean Grey while he only got a kiss and -- oops. Too much details already. Anyway, I don't think Jean Grey is any prettier but I still think Mystique is hot. Oh yeah babeh. Rating: 8/10.
I don't like Gerald anymore. Honestly. Weeks after I posted I had a crush on him, I started hating him. I didn't want him to be part of the Big 4. I hate Kim and Gerald's team-up. They're so annoying. Argh.
Oh yes, and finally after months of wishing and wanting, I finally have a Batman shirt! Woohoo! I've been searching practically every mall for a Batman shirt with a girl's cut but all I see are those for boys. Thank God for Toy Kingdom in Mall of Asia because they had one on my size..and black! Yaaay! =) Finally. Not too late for one, right? Anyway I also bought myself one comic book with Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman on the cover just to experience what it's like to read superhero comic books. Haha. No matter how much I crush on Mystique's powers, I'll still choose being a superhero over a mutant anytime. Because they possess so much mystery in them. They lead two lives -- the super one, and the ordinary one. And it's amazing how their raw human emotions weave these two lives together. Batman is still my number one crush because, well, in the comic book I bought he sounded so much smarter than Superman! Haha. Sorry for all the Clark Kent fans, but I still think he's an idiot sometimes. You know why I really, really like Batman over Superman? Because in the real comic book story (according to our English teacher) Batman will beat Superman, he will bring Superman down. And when I heard that I just wanted to shove it in all the Superman fanatics out there because HELLO! Batman has no superpowers, only really cool gadgets and amazing martial arts skills. Meanwhile, Superman does have superpowers and yet he was defeated by this powerless guy who happens to be his best friend. What kind of guy with super powers loses over a mortal? A mere human being? Only Superman. So, my conclusion is, Batman really is stronger than Superman in more ways than one. That is why Batman is still my biggest superhero crush. End of story. Haha. (with apologies to all Superman fans. Peace!)
I'm all for the Wonder Woman/Batman love affair. Hehe. And yes, I agree that Wonder Woman really is Batman's true love. He never really got over Wonder Woman. Aww. =) Click here to see a Batman/WW video. Totally sweet.
I don't like Gerald anymore. Honestly. Weeks after I posted I had a crush on him, I started hating him. I didn't want him to be part of the Big 4. I hate Kim and Gerald's team-up. They're so annoying. Argh.
Oh yes, and finally after months of wishing and wanting, I finally have a Batman shirt! Woohoo! I've been searching practically every mall for a Batman shirt with a girl's cut but all I see are those for boys. Thank God for Toy Kingdom in Mall of Asia because they had one on my size..and black! Yaaay! =) Finally. Not too late for one, right? Anyway I also bought myself one comic book with Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman on the cover just to experience what it's like to read superhero comic books. Haha. No matter how much I crush on Mystique's powers, I'll still choose being a superhero over a mutant anytime. Because they possess so much mystery in them. They lead two lives -- the super one, and the ordinary one. And it's amazing how their raw human emotions weave these two lives together. Batman is still my number one crush because, well, in the comic book I bought he sounded so much smarter than Superman! Haha. Sorry for all the Clark Kent fans, but I still think he's an idiot sometimes. You know why I really, really like Batman over Superman? Because in the real comic book story (according to our English teacher) Batman will beat Superman, he will bring Superman down. And when I heard that I just wanted to shove it in all the Superman fanatics out there because HELLO! Batman has no superpowers, only really cool gadgets and amazing martial arts skills. Meanwhile, Superman does have superpowers and yet he was defeated by this powerless guy who happens to be his best friend. What kind of guy with super powers loses over a mortal? A mere human being? Only Superman. So, my conclusion is, Batman really is stronger than Superman in more ways than one. That is why Batman is still my biggest superhero crush. End of story. Haha. (with apologies to all Superman fans. Peace!)
I'm all for the Wonder Woman/Batman love affair. Hehe. And yes, I agree that Wonder Woman really is Batman's true love. He never really got over Wonder Woman. Aww. =) Click here to see a Batman/WW video. Totally sweet.
I'm in love with The Fray already. I mean, really! I've downloaded seven of their songs from Limewire, and they were all beautiful! Once again, another great band I discovered through the music of One Tree Hill. But trust me, their songs are really good. I'm such a big fan already! Aside from Look After You, I also like All At Once, How To Save A Life and She Is. If I were to rate their band, I'd give them a complete 10 because they rock! =) I heart them.
A few hours from now and it literally is a "Sunday evening". Aaargh. Anyway, I'm done fixing my things and everything is ready. Except for me, I guess. But this is it. The time has finally arrived. No turning back. It's either I make this year suck, or I make it rock. And I want the latter. So au revoir to me, and to the rest of us, as we embark on yet another adventure in the journey called high school. Oh yeah!=)
Adieu, summer!
Bonjour, third year life.
A few hours from now and it literally is a "Sunday evening". Aaargh. Anyway, I'm done fixing my things and everything is ready. Except for me, I guess. But this is it. The time has finally arrived. No turning back. It's either I make this year suck, or I make it rock. And I want the latter. So au revoir to me, and to the rest of us, as we embark on yet another adventure in the journey called high school. Oh yeah!=)
Adieu, summer!
Bonjour, third year life.
"And all at once the crowd begins to sing,
Sometimes we'd never know
what's wrong without the pain,
Sometimes the hardest thing
and the right thing are the same.."
-- All At Once by The Fray
Sometimes we'd never know
what's wrong without the pain,
Sometimes the hardest thing
and the right thing are the same.."
-- All At Once by The Fray
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