It has been said that there is great peril in meeting someone you've admired for so long - often they do not live up to your expectations. They turn out to be less of the magnificent person you've conjured in your head, and more of a flawed, distorted, imperfect version. Which can either be a good or bad thing. Good, because at least you know they're human just like you. Bad, because wtf they're human just like you.

I tried coming into this interview with zero expectations - "tried" being the operative word here, because much as I wanted to be all professional (after all, I don't work for Scout; this is my first time to interview a celebrity; and first time to do a cover story) I was also very aware that the reason I was chosen to do the task was because I was, first and foremost, a fan.




"Fan" - it's such a funny word. It's either a badge you wear with honor or a label you detest. Either way, for most people, "fan" is associated with "irrational," "lovesick," or "obsessive." I sure as hell believed I was none of those adjectives, but I swear the moment I stepped into that shoot I became all of it. I couldn't decide how to sit, where to put my cellphone, how to look at her. It felt like staring at the sun, only instead of UV rays I got a simple girl putting her own makeup, preparing her own salad. But radiance and warmth just the same.

It has also been said that there is great danger in meeting and writing about someone you've admired for so long - often, you cannot encapsulate who they are. I've been asked a hundred times since the cover feature has been revealed: "How was she?" "What was she like?"




The funny thing is I've already written my article, and thought I've said what I can say about her. And yet, almost a month later, here I am, still finding excuses to write about her, still looking for ways to sneak her into the conversation, still wanting to talk to and about her. Because the thing is, she was nothing like my expectations. She was so much more. Which is something that a "lovesick / obsessed" fan will say about her. But it's true - she was great, and yes, I am a lovesick / obsessed fan. She was casual, and honest, and candid. She was willing to talk openly about her love life and her ambitions. She gamely played with the photographer's and layout team's ideas. She made jokes; she told stories (some about herself, some about James, one about another fandom - hahaha #secret).

But more than that, she seemed like a great friend. And isn't that what we all want? To be friends with the people we admire? The way she answered her questions, man I swear I felt like we could be BFFs if we just had more time. Don't get me wrong - I'm under no illusions that if I message her randomly she'll remember me and we'll get to hang out. But, she really seemed like the kind of person I - and consequently, everyone - could connect with. No pretenses.

Which is the most we can hope for when we meet our idols, I guess. That we are given a glimpse of who they are behind the persona. At the end of the day, she is still after all human. But more than just a girl, she is a person with stories. A person with dreams, with plans, with questions. With things that bother her, things that make her heart leap for joy.  

If there's one thing I've learned from reading all these cases and jurisprudence in law school, it's this: Never forget that these people are real. The names you read about in SCRA? People. The faces you imagine as you memorize doctrines? People. And in the same way, the artistas whose photos we like on IG and whose teleseryes we follow religiously? People. And if there's also one thing I've learned from my degree in college, it's this: It's important to get to humanize the people you write about. They are not two-dimensional characters with quotes. It's all pretty much the same. And the most important thing to remember always is that when you meet someone, as a fan, as a writer, as a lawyer, it's important to find these stories, so that we can paint a better picture of them, something we can hold on to with great pride and respect. It doesn't matter if you come in there as a fan or as a mere observer - just as long as you find it and you do it well. And when we get to find that common ground with anyone - celebrity, stranger, whoever - it makes for the best kinds of stories. Plural.





So I guess that entire experience can't really be summed up with one article. Or one caption. It was just an hour of the interview, but I felt like we talked for hours. Which you can chalk up to my being a lovesick / obsessed fangirl. Or you can blame it on Nadine being able to put her walls down and reveal parts of herself to people who are eager to listen. Either way, it makes for a great fan encounter - and a great story to write about again and again.




P.S. If you want to read the cover story I wrote featuring Nadine, grab a copy of this month's January-February issue of Scout! It's available online here or at select campuses, and National Bookstore & Powerbooks branches :)






(Credits: All photos from the issue itself are from Scout magazine. The BTS shot as well as my photo with her are from my camera. The photo of James and Nadine was grabbed from her Instagram account. The photo of me and my boyfriend was grabbed from his phone wallpaper #hehe)

For someone who just finished law school, I've been watching Scrubs A LOT these days. Funnily enough, I have no interest in obsessing over any legal shows to "reignite my passions" or "get the ball rolling" right before bar review. Or at any time in the last four and a half years, actually. Sure, on occasion, I'd pop in my DVD of Ally McBeal the few weeks before finals and marathon while powering through the last bunch of cases for the semester, or sometimes when I'm at home I'd catch whatever episode of Suits is on Jack TV out of curiosity's sake. But I'm not as invested in those shows as I am with this medical comedy - something completely opposite of what I'm doing, but also, oddly familiar.

I think the thing that has gotten me hooked again on it this time - after the nth rewatch - is how my perspective has altered the way I'm seeing the show. The series starts with the lead characters beginning their first year of internship as medical doctors. They have just graduated medical school, they now have this newfound sense of authority, but also this staggering responsibility. Before stepping into the halls of Sacred Heart Hospitals, they were merely students, with adequate working knowledge of medicine. As the series (and their internship) continues, they come face to face with the hard realities of actually being a doctor: making tough calls and living with those decisions.

If you think about it, it's not that different from the realities of a new lawyer. (Or in my case, a fresh-out-of-law-school no-longer-a-student... uhm, person). It is overwhelming. And it can be crippling to be in a position where all decisions made are crucial because lives are suddenly on the line, every single time. People are no longer just names on a case, they are actual persons in real trouble seeking for your help.

But mostly, I think I just long for the humanity of it all. Scrubs gives me that. Doctors are expected to save the day, much like lawyers. But unlike the latter, the world views doctors as kind and compassionate people. They heal. Even if their arrival often signals sickness or death, it also presages a kind of hope. They aren't walking creatures of doom - or worse, greed. You know that deep down, they are people who care. Empathy is the biggest tool in their disposal.

Which is so unlike the field of lawyering. Most lawyers are aggressive, abrasive, and arrogant. Sadly, those are qualities that make for some of the greatest lawyers too.





Perhaps being in a cut-throat environment like law school made me forget what it's like to be in a place that is more compassionate than competitive. And I think the reason I've been so invested in Scrubs lately is because I needed to remember why I'm in this field in the first place - that I too want to make a difference. I want to be part of solutions, I want to get people out of a rut, I want to give someone their victory - but without being a dick about it. I can help, and also be kind and compassionate about it.

In the next few months, I'm about to begin my bar review. And I've been told repeatedly by friends that it's the biggest, most difficult challenge any law graduate would have to face. I think I've been preparing myself mentally since my classmates took the bar last November. But my heart needed the reminder that I'm doing this for the right reasons. I'm not here to prove that I'm the best or the smartest or the greatest. I just want to retain a piece of this cheery, outgoing self and still be good at what I dream to do. And that even though I'm the way I am, it doesn't mean I will suck at being a lawyer. It just means I'm going to be different. Hopefully, that's a good thing.

Much has already been said about the year 2016.  It had high highs, it had low lows. It signaled the beginning of things, it ushered in many endings.

Labels: required reading

It has been said that there is great peril in meeting someone you've admired for so long - often they do not live up to your expectations. They turn out to be less of the magnificent person you've conjured in your head, and more of a flawed, distorted, imperfect version. Which can either be a good or bad thing. Good, because at least you know they're human just like you. Bad, because wtf they're human just like you.

I tried coming into this interview with zero expectations - "tried" being the operative word here, because much as I wanted to be all professional (after all, I don't work for Scout; this is my first time to interview a celebrity; and first time to do a cover story) I was also very aware that the reason I was chosen to do the task was because I was, first and foremost, a fan.




"Fan" - it's such a funny word. It's either a badge you wear with honor or a label you detest. Either way, for most people, "fan" is associated with "irrational," "lovesick," or "obsessive." I sure as hell believed I was none of those adjectives, but I swear the moment I stepped into that shoot I became all of it. I couldn't decide how to sit, where to put my cellphone, how to look at her. It felt like staring at the sun, only instead of UV rays I got a simple girl putting her own makeup, preparing her own salad. But radiance and warmth just the same.

It has also been said that there is great danger in meeting and writing about someone you've admired for so long - often, you cannot encapsulate who they are. I've been asked a hundred times since the cover feature has been revealed: "How was she?" "What was she like?"




The funny thing is I've already written my article, and thought I've said what I can say about her. And yet, almost a month later, here I am, still finding excuses to write about her, still looking for ways to sneak her into the conversation, still wanting to talk to and about her. Because the thing is, she was nothing like my expectations. She was so much more. Which is something that a "lovesick / obsessed" fan will say about her. But it's true - she was great, and yes, I am a lovesick / obsessed fan. She was casual, and honest, and candid. She was willing to talk openly about her love life and her ambitions. She gamely played with the photographer's and layout team's ideas. She made jokes; she told stories (some about herself, some about James, one about another fandom - hahaha #secret).

But more than that, she seemed like a great friend. And isn't that what we all want? To be friends with the people we admire? The way she answered her questions, man I swear I felt like we could be BFFs if we just had more time. Don't get me wrong - I'm under no illusions that if I message her randomly she'll remember me and we'll get to hang out. But, she really seemed like the kind of person I - and consequently, everyone - could connect with. No pretenses.

Which is the most we can hope for when we meet our idols, I guess. That we are given a glimpse of who they are behind the persona. At the end of the day, she is still after all human. But more than just a girl, she is a person with stories. A person with dreams, with plans, with questions. With things that bother her, things that make her heart leap for joy.  

If there's one thing I've learned from reading all these cases and jurisprudence in law school, it's this: Never forget that these people are real. The names you read about in SCRA? People. The faces you imagine as you memorize doctrines? People. And in the same way, the artistas whose photos we like on IG and whose teleseryes we follow religiously? People. And if there's also one thing I've learned from my degree in college, it's this: It's important to get to humanize the people you write about. They are not two-dimensional characters with quotes. It's all pretty much the same. And the most important thing to remember always is that when you meet someone, as a fan, as a writer, as a lawyer, it's important to find these stories, so that we can paint a better picture of them, something we can hold on to with great pride and respect. It doesn't matter if you come in there as a fan or as a mere observer - just as long as you find it and you do it well. And when we get to find that common ground with anyone - celebrity, stranger, whoever - it makes for the best kinds of stories. Plural.





So I guess that entire experience can't really be summed up with one article. Or one caption. It was just an hour of the interview, but I felt like we talked for hours. Which you can chalk up to my being a lovesick / obsessed fangirl. Or you can blame it on Nadine being able to put her walls down and reveal parts of herself to people who are eager to listen. Either way, it makes for a great fan encounter - and a great story to write about again and again.




P.S. If you want to read the cover story I wrote featuring Nadine, grab a copy of this month's January-February issue of Scout! It's available online here or at select campuses, and National Bookstore & Powerbooks branches :)






(Credits: All photos from the issue itself are from Scout magazine. The BTS shot as well as my photo with her are from my camera. The photo of James and Nadine was grabbed from her Instagram account. The photo of me and my boyfriend was grabbed from his phone wallpaper #hehe)

For someone who just finished law school, I've been watching Scrubs A LOT these days. Funnily enough, I have no interest in obsessing over any legal shows to "reignite my passions" or "get the ball rolling" right before bar review. Or at any time in the last four and a half years, actually. Sure, on occasion, I'd pop in my DVD of Ally McBeal the few weeks before finals and marathon while powering through the last bunch of cases for the semester, or sometimes when I'm at home I'd catch whatever episode of Suits is on Jack TV out of curiosity's sake. But I'm not as invested in those shows as I am with this medical comedy - something completely opposite of what I'm doing, but also, oddly familiar.

I think the thing that has gotten me hooked again on it this time - after the nth rewatch - is how my perspective has altered the way I'm seeing the show. The series starts with the lead characters beginning their first year of internship as medical doctors. They have just graduated medical school, they now have this newfound sense of authority, but also this staggering responsibility. Before stepping into the halls of Sacred Heart Hospitals, they were merely students, with adequate working knowledge of medicine. As the series (and their internship) continues, they come face to face with the hard realities of actually being a doctor: making tough calls and living with those decisions.

If you think about it, it's not that different from the realities of a new lawyer. (Or in my case, a fresh-out-of-law-school no-longer-a-student... uhm, person). It is overwhelming. And it can be crippling to be in a position where all decisions made are crucial because lives are suddenly on the line, every single time. People are no longer just names on a case, they are actual persons in real trouble seeking for your help.

But mostly, I think I just long for the humanity of it all. Scrubs gives me that. Doctors are expected to save the day, much like lawyers. But unlike the latter, the world views doctors as kind and compassionate people. They heal. Even if their arrival often signals sickness or death, it also presages a kind of hope. They aren't walking creatures of doom - or worse, greed. You know that deep down, they are people who care. Empathy is the biggest tool in their disposal.

Which is so unlike the field of lawyering. Most lawyers are aggressive, abrasive, and arrogant. Sadly, those are qualities that make for some of the greatest lawyers too.





Perhaps being in a cut-throat environment like law school made me forget what it's like to be in a place that is more compassionate than competitive. And I think the reason I've been so invested in Scrubs lately is because I needed to remember why I'm in this field in the first place - that I too want to make a difference. I want to be part of solutions, I want to get people out of a rut, I want to give someone their victory - but without being a dick about it. I can help, and also be kind and compassionate about it.

In the next few months, I'm about to begin my bar review. And I've been told repeatedly by friends that it's the biggest, most difficult challenge any law graduate would have to face. I think I've been preparing myself mentally since my classmates took the bar last November. But my heart needed the reminder that I'm doing this for the right reasons. I'm not here to prove that I'm the best or the smartest or the greatest. I just want to retain a piece of this cheery, outgoing self and still be good at what I dream to do. And that even though I'm the way I am, it doesn't mean I will suck at being a lawyer. It just means I'm going to be different. Hopefully, that's a good thing.

Much has already been said about the year 2016.  It had high highs, it had low lows. It signaled the beginning of things, it ushered in many endings.

Labels: required reading

Hello, I'm Karla Bernardo. If you Google my name, you will find the Wikipedia entry of a Canadian serial-killer (and trust me, you do not want to read about that - but I'm sure you will because now you're curious), which is why I suggest you type Bombastarr instead so you can stalk me better.

I spent eight-and-a-half years of my life in the University of the Philippines, where I graduated with degrees in Creative Writing and Juris Doctor. It is also where I learned how to speak a bit of Italian, got a taste of the best tapsilog, and took striptease for PE.

I love telling stories, as much as I enjoy finding them.

<center><font style="color: #ffffff;">____</font>Want <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/09096636074047764491">more</a>?</center><br>

Featured Works

Stargirl (Cover story for Nadine Lustre, Scout, January-February 2017)
Surreal / So Real (at Scout)
Ode to a Great Love's 17-year-old Self (Love.Life, Philippine Daily Inquirer)
Postcard from Diliman (Youngblood, Philippine Daily Inquirer)

Writer for Philippine Law Register
A Call to Arms (January 2017)
Expecting the Expected (March 2016)

Former Writer for Stache Magazine
The Hero's Journey (June 2013)
The 8 People You Become In Your Youth (June 2013)
The Best Bad Idea That Is Argo (April 2013)
Mike Ross Remembers Everything You Don't (August 2012)
Style Between the Riffs (August 2012)
Book Lovers Never Sleep Alone (June 2012)
A Spectrum of Change (December 2011)
Digital Art (October 2011)
Elements of Style (June 2011)
In Her White Dress (All-Art April 2011 issue)

Morning After Pill (Fervore: Literary Folio 2013, UP Portia Sorority)
How To Make a Blueberry Cheesecake (Kalas: Kalasag Literary Folio 2011, UP College of Arts and Letters)
January 14th (100: The Hundreds Project, UP Writer's Club)

An Ode to The Pillow Book (at New-Slang)
Introductions (at TeenInk)
One by One (at TeenInk)

   

Recently

27(.5)
Endgame
Standout Songs: "Overkill" on Scrubs
You'll be out of the dark, yeah you'll get your shot
Music of the Night
Marrakesh Treaty: More access to books for the vis...
How we weep and laugh at the same thing
Something
Conflict resolution
Book frustrations

This Is How It Doesn't Start

this is how it doesn't start, in eleven parts

Labels

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Got a comment, question, violent reaction, love letter, or random piece of information you want to share with me? Just fire away. I don't bite.

(I changed my form and went back to Freedback because Ask.fm's being a bitch, requiring people to sign up for accounts before asking questions. Because I love you guys, I tweaked my ask box a bit, so that the questions will now go directly to my e-mail, but I'll be posting the answers still on my Ask.fm for convenience. TL;DR - I'll still be getting your questions so no worries. You're still free to harass me / send me your love.)

Answers

Most Frequently Asked Question

Are you a pornstar?
No, I am not a pornstar, stripper, or your friendly neighborhood call girl. It's just a fancy pseudonym with a long history, and two R's. Rawr.

Bombastarr is my personal blog and my little corner in the Internet since 2005. Yes, I started writing here when I was 13 years old (aka when I was very angsty, hormonal, and always gushing at the littlest things) -- ergo, you'd have to forgive me if you come across an old post that reeks of immaturity and slightly unpolished grammar. I did a lot of growing up here, and from the looks of it, there's still a lot of growing up to do, so I don't think I'll be leaving this place any time soon.

The domain, Bombastarr.com, was purchased on June 2014 and launched on July 2014, on the blog's ninth year (and fifth month, to be exact).

It's crazy to think that this blog is now thirteen years old, because (1) that seems like an eternity in internet years, and (2) that means if my blog were a kid, it's a teenager! That's insane.

Here's to more tales, explosive and otherwise.

If you've been living under a rock and think I'm a threat to world peace or an object of covetousness, sorry to disappoint you, folks: it's just a fancy pseudonym.

As in most things, it started in high school. It began as a joke between me and a couple of friends during our freshman year. We were practicing for a field demonstration dance which involved the use of shawls, and being the crazy-always-trying-to-be-funny person that I was (or I always attempted to be) I started doing poses with the garment. Someone started taking my picture using my phone, and one shot looked like I was posing for those B-list movies (or should it be R-list, as in R-rated?) of the vegetable-nomenclature variety. #IKYWIM. Hence, the word, "Bombastarr." Yes, very cheeky, I know, but for a 13-year-old, it was quirky enough to figure as a username. That was 2005, right around the time I trying to decide on a URL for a new blog. It's been a lot of years since, and what started as a joke became something I've eventually embraced as an identity.

Despite the many other chances I've gotten to permanently move (to Multiply, Livejournal, Tumblr, Wordpress; to a bigger platform where I can earn or use the blog as a venue for commerce), I've come to realize that Bombastarr is something I can never truly leave behind. It is a place I've grown to appreciate and love because it is a place I can call my own. It's a venue for my rants, my views, my writing. It is home, and it is who I am.

Bombastarr is a glimpse of my life: the thoughts, ideas, and stories that shape it into what it is, and what it will still become. This journal has been with me for all my crazy, often embarrassing adventures, but I'm sure there will be more anecdotes and feelings and people to write about. Which is something I'm really looking forward to. After all, you know what they say about the greatest stories - sometimes, there's still a lot that's left unwritten.

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