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yresim.
It's such a crazy feeling. When we don't talk, I feel isolated. When we fight, it's like this heavy metal was placed inside my chest. I can't breathe, I can't think. My mind clouds and I cannot concentrate. I want to cry, but the worst part is that I can't.
I feel like I cry too much even if I haven't. I feel like I shout so loud even if my mouth is shut. I feel like I have been miserable all my life, when I know I'm not. I feel chaotic when I'm silent. I feel troubled when I'm okay. What is happening to me? Am I going out of my mind?
Sometimes I feel so lost. I feel alone, even when I know there are a lot of people around me. I feel invisible, I feel numb. I try to cry, but I can't. I breathe but I don't feel the air. And when everything seems like it all crashed, I'm not really sure if it did. I really feel lost. I don't know what to do or to say. They say I'm too sensitive, but can I help it if I get hurt? You know, I don't even know WHEN to get hurt. WHEN to say I CAN'T TAKE IT and WHEN to cry. I just feel.. weird.
I am different. I feel different. I know nothing has changed, but why does it feel like it did?? Why do I feel like we're so apart? Why do you laugh when I cry? Why do you ignore me when I need you? Why do you get mad when I joke on you? WHY? And what hurts is that.. I can't ask you these. I just can't. I don't have the heart to say these all in your face and stand all the isolation. I CAN'T. Because the truth is that you carry me with you. And when I hurt you, I hurt me. When I stab you, I kill me. And hard as it is to accept, it has been this way all the time. Haven't you ever noticed why I'm always there, waiting for you, not fighting you, not getting mad at you? Because I can't stand the thought of knowing that you might not be there.
TALK TO ME. DON'T DO THIS. I TRY MY BEST TO LIVE A LIFE ON MY OWN BUT I CAN'T. SPEAK TO ME. DON'T DO THIS. DON'T LEAVE.
don't make me feel more miserable than I already am.
hay. special day pa naman ngayon.
"oh.. hindi ko maisip kung wala ka,
oh.. sa buhay ko."
sorry guys I'm being too dramatic. maybe it's because of too much crinkles.
________________________________________________________________
yresim.
It's such a crazy feeling. When we don't talk, I feel isolated. When we fight, it's like this heavy metal was placed inside my chest. I can't breathe, I can't think. My mind clouds and I cannot concentrate. I want to cry, but the worst part is that I can't.
I feel like I cry too much even if I haven't. I feel like I shout so loud even if my mouth is shut. I feel like I have been miserable all my life, when I know I'm not. I feel chaotic when I'm silent. I feel troubled when I'm okay. What is happening to me? Am I going out of my mind?
Sometimes I feel so lost. I feel alone, even when I know there are a lot of people around me. I feel invisible, I feel numb. I try to cry, but I can't. I breathe but I don't feel the air. And when everything seems like it all crashed, I'm not really sure if it did. I really feel lost. I don't know what to do or to say. They say I'm too sensitive, but can I help it if I get hurt? You know, I don't even know WHEN to get hurt. WHEN to say I CAN'T TAKE IT and WHEN to cry. I just feel.. weird.
I am different. I feel different. I know nothing has changed, but why does it feel like it did?? Why do I feel like we're so apart? Why do you laugh when I cry? Why do you ignore me when I need you? Why do you get mad when I joke on you? WHY? And what hurts is that.. I can't ask you these. I just can't. I don't have the heart to say these all in your face and stand all the isolation. I CAN'T. Because the truth is that you carry me with you. And when I hurt you, I hurt me. When I stab you, I kill me. And hard as it is to accept, it has been this way all the time. Haven't you ever noticed why I'm always there, waiting for you, not fighting you, not getting mad at you? Because I can't stand the thought of knowing that you might not be there.
TALK TO ME. DON'T DO THIS. I TRY MY BEST TO LIVE A LIFE ON MY OWN BUT I CAN'T. SPEAK TO ME. DON'T DO THIS. DON'T LEAVE.
don't make me feel more miserable than I already am.
hay. special day pa naman ngayon.
"oh.. hindi ko maisip kung wala ka,
oh.. sa buhay ko."
sorry guys I'm being too dramatic. maybe it's because of too much crinkles.
________________________________________________________________
She's a modern lover; it's an exploration, she's made of outer space
Hello, I'm Karla Bernardo. If you Google my name, you will find the Wikipedia entry of a Canadian serial-killer (and trust me, you do not want
to read about that - but I'm sure you will because now you're curious), which is why I suggest you type Bombastarr instead so you can stalk me better.
I spent eight-and-a-half years of my life in the University of the Philippines, where I graduated with degrees in Creative Writing and Juris Doctor. It is also where I learned how to speak a bit of Italian, got a taste of the best tapsilog, and took striptease for PE.
I love telling stories, as much as I enjoy finding them.
<![CDATA[<center><font style="color: #ffffff;">____</font>Want <a href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/09096636074047764491">more</a>?</center><br>]]>
Featured Works
Stargirl ( Cover story for Nadine Lustre, Scout, January-February 2017)
Surreal / So Real (at Scout)
Ode to a Great Love's 17-year-old Self ( Love.Life, Philippine Daily Inquirer)
Postcard from Diliman
( Youngblood, Philippine Daily Inquirer)
Writer for Philippine Law Register
A Call to Arms (January 2017)
Expecting the Expected (March 2016)
Former Writer for Stache Magazine
The Hero's Journey (June 2013)
The 8 People You Become In Your Youth (June 2013)
The Best Bad Idea That Is Argo (April 2013)
Mike Ross Remembers Everything You Don't (August 2012)
Style Between the Riffs (August 2012)
Book Lovers Never Sleep Alone (June 2012)
A Spectrum of Change (December 2011)
Digital Art (October 2011)
Elements of Style (June 2011)
In Her White Dress (All-Art April 2011 issue)
Morning After Pill ( Fervore: Literary Folio 2013, UP Portia Sorority)
How To Make a Blueberry Cheesecake ( Kalas: Kalasag Literary Folio 2011, UP College of Arts and Letters)
January 14th ( 100: The Hundreds Project, UP Writer's Club)
An Ode to The
Pillow Book (at New-Slang)
Introductions (at TeenInk)
One by One (at TeenInk)
Ask, and you shall be answered
Got a comment, question, violent reaction, love letter, or random piece of information you want to share with me? Just fire away. I don't bite.
(I changed my form and went back to Freedback because Ask.fm's being a bitch, requiring people to sign up for accounts before asking questions. Because I love you guys, I tweaked my ask box a bit, so that the questions will now go directly to my e-mail, but I'll be posting the answers still on my Ask.fm for convenience. TL;DR - I'll still be getting your questions so no worries. You're still free to harass me / send me your love.)
Answers
Most Frequently Asked QuestionAre you a pornstar?No, I am not a pornstar, stripper, or your friendly neighborhood call girl. It's just a fancy pseudonym with a long history, and two R's. Rawr.
Bombastarr.com
Bombastarr is my personal blog and my little corner in the Internet since 2005. Yes, I started writing here when I was 13 years old (aka when I was very angsty, hormonal, and always gushing at the littlest things) -- ergo, you'd have to forgive me if you come across an old post that reeks of immaturity and slightly unpolished grammar. I did a lot of growing up here, and from the looks of it, there's still a lot of growing up to do, so I don't think I'll be leaving this place any time soon.
The domain, Bombastarr.com, was purchased on June 2014 and
launched on July 2014, on the blog's ninth year (and fifth month, to be exact).
It's crazy to think that this blog is now thirteen years old, because (1) that seems like an eternity in internet years, and (2) that means if my blog were a kid, it's a teenager! That's insane.
Here's to more tales, explosive and otherwise.
So, why Bombastarr?
If you've been living under a rock and think I'm a threat to world peace or an object of covetousness, sorry to disappoint you, folks: it's just a fancy pseudonym.
As in most things, it started in high school. It began as a joke between me and a couple of friends during our freshman year. We were practicing for a field demonstration dance which involved the use of shawls, and being the crazy-always-trying-to-be-funny person that I was (or I always attempted to be) I started doing poses with the garment. Someone started taking my picture using my phone, and one shot looked like I was posing for those B-list movies (or should it be R-list, as in R-rated?) of the vegetable-nomenclature variety. #IKYWIM. Hence, the word, "Bombastarr." Yes, very cheeky, I know, but for a 13-year-old, it was quirky enough to figure as a username. That was 2005, right around the time I trying to decide on a URL for a new blog. It's been a lot of years since, and what started as a joke became something I've eventually embraced as an identity.
Despite the many other chances I've gotten to permanently move (to Multiply, Livejournal, Tumblr, Wordpress; to a bigger platform where I can earn or use the blog as a venue for commerce), I've come to realize that Bombastarr is something I can never truly leave behind. It is a place I've grown to appreciate and love because it is a place I can call my own. It's a venue for my rants, my views, my writing. It is home, and it is who I am.
Bombastarr is a glimpse of my life: the thoughts, ideas, and stories that shape it into what it is, and what it will still become. This journal has been with me for all my crazy, often embarrassing adventures, but I'm sure there will be more anecdotes and feelings and people to write about. Which is something I'm really looking forward to. After all, you know what they say about the greatest stories - sometimes, there's still a lot that's left unwritten.
Credits and thank you's
This blog is hosted by PhilHosting.net, and powered by Blogger. The layout is coded entirely by me.
Photo hosting: TinyPic, Photobucket
Question box: EmailMeForm, Ask.fm
Copyright © BOMBASTARR
Elsewhere, she wanders
<![CDATA[
<a href="http://twitter.com/thebombastarr" border="0" target="_blank"><img border="0" src="http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y234/bombastarr/twitter1.png"></a> ]]>
@karlabernardo
Friends, links & affiliates
<![CDATA[
<h1>Links & Affiliates</h1><div class="blogbody">
<a href="http://maryofthewild.com/" target="_blank">Ayiene Silvestre</a><br>
<a href="http://biancabiancita.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Bianca Cabillar</a><br>
<a href="http://latenightepisodes.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Cars Pascual</a><br>
<a href="http://ceejaedelrosario.tumblr.com" target="_blank">Ceejae Del Rosario</a><br>
<a href="http://inipitadventures.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Daryll Santillan</a><br>
<a href="http://mirelasestrellas.blogspot.com/" target=_"blank">Eura Yuste</a><br>
<a href="http://kissingfriday.tumblr.com/" target="_blank">Gyk Icmat</a><br>
<a href="http://imyouronlyhope.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Hope Velasco</a><br>
<a href="http://deathcabforkitty.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Kaisa Aquino</a><br>
<a href="http://vain-aholic.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Maye Dellosa</a><br>
<a href="http://thedramaholic.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Ninin Sampiano</a><br>
<a href="http://speakinginwords.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Patrick Santiano</a><br>
<a href="http://walledplayground.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Paula Deveraturda</a><br>
<a href="http://thebestdamnconstellation.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Regine Aurellano</a><br>
<a href="http://arceecola.blogspot.com" target="_blank">Rose Basa</a><br>
<a href="http://spencetheknight.wordpress.com" target="_blank">Spence the Knight</a><br><br></div>
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